On Deciding to Procreate

 “Having a baby is like getting a tattoo on your face. You really need to be certain it's what you want before you commit.”
― Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat, Pray, Love


The idea that we'll be parents in a few short months is pretty mind-boggling to me.  We knew, early in our relationship, that we'd like to have children some day, but not immediately.  We wanted to have ample time to grow our relationship as a married couple first.  Having these past three years, seeing the world, and getting to know each other that much better has been perfect.  I can honestly say that my relationship with Brian is stronger than it ever has been.  Alas, had I not heard my biological clock ticking louder after turning 32, I would have happily/selfishly kept my husband all to myself for another couple of years! 

The decision to have kids is not one we took lightly, but rather, something we had been considering for quite a long time.  It definitely stemmed more from the train of thought of; "We're ready and looking forward to imparting 61 collective years of knowledge and experiences on the next generation" as opposed to "Aww, what a cute baby, I want one of those!" (Although, since becoming pregnant, I don't deny that the latter has crossed my mind!) 

I see the shows that glorify teen pregnancy and hear the words "baby fever" and cringe... a lot.  I wondered for a while if we were making the right decision.  Do we really want to expose another person to all of the problems in the world?  Aside from the biggest issues like war and poverty (and reality tv),  I can't help but agonize over bringing a child into our AF dictated, nomadic lifestyle.  Then again, how could we deny someone the beauty and amazing experiences that are out there, especially those that come from living in different areas around the globe?  Do these experiences justify the need to take a long-haul flight to see the closest family member?  Currently, as it's just Brian and myself, I'd say 'absolutely,' however, I think that question will be increasingly harder to answer when the baby is here.  

What I do know, is that the wonderfulness of the world far trumps the bad... I just hope we have the ability to teach our child to see it that way.  I also see my friends who have struggled for years with infertility, pregnancy losses and health issues and wonder how we got so very lucky.  Odd as it is to say, I feel privileged to be bringing a new life into the world.  Now don't get me wrong... that's not to say that pregnancy is fun.  No, truth be told, it's frightening, annoying, and fairly miserable.  I hear the end result is worth it though; I guess we'll see in a few months!